Hi Reader,

Ria told me she felt like she was always searching for something.

She would eat, and a little while later, want more. Not because she was hungry exactly, but because something felt unfinished.(some times we call it cravings) She kept reaching for one more thing, then another, and none of it ever quite landed. "I feel like I have no off switch," she said.

I told her she had a perfect off switch. She just kept buying sofas when her body was asking for a bed.

Let me explain, because this one changes how you see every craving.

Imagine you are tired and you want somewhere comfortable to lie down. But you do not quite realise that what you need is a bed. You only feel "I want comfort." So you go out and buy a beautiful sofa. You sit on it. Lovely. But when you try to actually rest on it, it does not work. So you decide the sofa was not good enough, and you go looking for another, better sofa. And then another. Your house fills up with sofas, and you still cannot sleep, because no number of sofas will ever be a bed.

Your body works the same way. It is not really asking for "food." It is asking for specific things. Protein. Vegetables. Water. Rest. Each one has a job. When a job goes unfilled, the body keeps sending you back to the kitchen, searching. And if every time you answer that search with the same quick carb, the same handful of something, you are buying another sofa. It feels right for a moment. It does not fill the actual gap. So the searching continues.

This is why the answer to constant cravings is almost never "eat less" or "try harder." Very often it is the opposite. It is making sure the real needs are genuinely met. When your body has had enough protein, enough vegetables, enough water, enough sleep, the frantic searching quietens on its own, because there is no longer an empty room it is trying to furnish.

The cravings were never proof that Ria was greedy or weak. They were a message, sent over and over, that a real need was going unanswered. She had just been answering it with the wrong thing.

One small thing to try this week. The next time you find yourself searching for "something" after you have already eaten, pause and ask one question before you reach. Did this meal actually have protein and vegetables in it, or was it mostly the quick, comforting stuff. You are not judging yourself. You are only checking whether you bought a sofa when your body asked for a bed. AAlso try what you feel after a good meal which had protein or veggies or when you had enough water or when you slept well, or had less meetings or less screen times. This is all data.

Learning to read what your body is truly asking for, underneath all the noise, is subtle work, and it goes much faster with someone helping you listen. It is most of what I do, quietly, with a few women at a time.

Ria was never broken. She was just furnishing the wrong room. You were never the problem either.

Dhaval
Recovery First Method

Two ways to go deeper when you are ready:
Read the free guide, You Were Never the Problem: dhavalbhadeshiya.com/free-guide
Apply for Project Phoenix, six months of private one to one coaching: dhavalbhadeshiya.com/apply